There are soooo many of my friends getting engaged these days. I mean, every single day it seems that there are pictures and statuses smothered in kissing and rings. So this post is for all those friends. Things I have learned about marriage (ya know, in my whole two months) It's about to get real.
Legally hitching your wagon to another person's for the rest of
Um yeah, you can say "super scary," right? I thought I would have to give up a lot, which in some ways, I have. I live in Texas (not in sunny, amazing, gorgeous California) away from my parents and sisters, most of my hobbies include a lot more grown up responsibilities (like making sure the laundry doesn't pile up and James's homework gets done) and sharing everything.
Now to everyone else, those things may seem like a LOT. But honestly, I can't think of a better way to advance in life than alongside your best friend. Taking care of each other. Sharing everything.
While I was engaged, I was talking to my other best friend in the world, who was also engaged. And thank goodness because pretty much our whole lives have lined up and been perfectly in sync. So she's always the first person to call. I don't know about everyone else, but for me, I was a grouch planning a wedding. I put way too much pressure on myself and everything to be perfect (that's another point) and it made me not like myself and fight with a much more patient James so much. So after crying to her and telling her my whole saga of a sob story, she was telling me how she and her fiance (now husband!) Grant got through it. She said that she stopped thinking of everything as her's and it became their's. The goals, the problems, everything. It wasn't just about her anymore and walking away, breaking up, leaving--those weren't an option anymore.
Every since this smart lady shared that with me, it woke me up! It's not just about me. I can't just break up with my fiance because I'm having a rough patch. And I've remembered it every single day since. I get to part of a we!! I love not having to say goodnight to James! And I love seeing him first thing in the morning and snuggling up to him at night! Everything is worth it, promise. I finally just told myself as long as I'm sealed to James at the end of the day, everything will be perfect.
Also, do NOT stress about little details. My super wise older sister told me in the very beginning to take care of the big things first and make sure you get exactly what you want with those. Then work out the details. My mom and I ripped our hair out on all the small things, and guess what. My husband got sick on our wedding day and couldn't enjoy any of it. Luckily, because I come from and have inherited the greatest family EVER, people still stayed and had an amazing time. So just enjoy the whole day. If planning is getting to be too much and turning you into the worst version of yourself, take a break from it for a day and just soak up some private time with your almost-spouse. It is the best cure in the world.
Most of all, enjoy every single little part too, all of the engagement and wedding day and all the "firsts" after because it only happens once and it's over! Then it's just you & that person every single day, living one life together as a package deal. But don't worry. I can tell you things just keep getting better & better. So be excited.
Congratulations everyone!! I am so excited to have jumped on this bandwagon and I know you will be too!!